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View Full Version : Do you ever think of killing yourself sometimes?



Darren
08-30-2008, 11:18 PM
I do everynow and then...

But then i think, how will it affect my family? How will it affect my friends?

When you feel you've had enough....or better, when you feel the world has had enough, you feel like you need to take that butcher knife to your throat and slit everything that is fear to you....away...until it lies in a bloody pool in your bedroom...or bathroom...whatever


Everything you've ever loved..gone, everything you ever believed in...gone, everything you've ever worked hard towards wether it be reputation or life abitions...gone


Can one really leave everything behind so easily? All that troubles us? Can it really be solved so simply as killing one-self?

What would thy lord think? If he or possibly she exist? What would the family think? Especially if they think you were perfectly fine! Then they find out that you've killed yourself...would they think they really paid attention to you?...would they think they really knew you?


As far as i know whom ever has killed themselves has killed themselves for a reason, some have gone down in history for it..and some have not. I do also know that people have killed themselves for pointless reasons.

Which reminds me of the time my friend was drunk and she just got dumped....she and some other people came to a party i was at....she came to me upset, i in my drunken state comforted her as i normally would but she left..which it had to be the worse rain storm ever to be...I followed her, she kept trying to drown herself in the oversized puddles (seriously..they were too big and in too many numbers). I followed her and stopped her countless of times untill we met up to some of her friends, i let them take care of her from then. I returned soaking wet, without a dry pair of clothes..i slept that night wet and freezing....it wasn't till the next afternoon i got home and took a shower then to actually get warm dry clothes. I th ink to this day what would of become of her if i never stopped her? I mean she has lost like ALOT and i do mean ALOT of weight to this very day....the disappointing thing is the next day i talked to her on msn...and she didn't remember it, i mean fair enough she was pretty wasted..but she never even thanked me for it =/


God knows how i got into that ramble...

Too much vodka xD You have NO idea how many times i had to delete and correct all of that LOL


Ignore an old man's drunken words

Vampi
08-30-2008, 11:59 PM
When you post sh*t like this, you really make me worry about you:[ You posted another thread somewhere about suicide or cutting or something, and it made me think. Now that you've posted more directly, it makes me worry.


If you need help, you can always ask ANYONE at this forum for help, or follow the links to get help elsewhere.
I might have to fly to your place to attend your funeral if you were to die, Benny:[
'Twould make me very sad.


-Vampi

Darren
08-31-2008, 12:31 AM
Don't worry about me...Vodka has just revealed another ugly past of myself, i am fine...believe me! If i wasn't i would of killed myself by now...trust me.

Vampi
08-31-2008, 02:25 AM
I'm comforted by your words...-not-.

benny:/
baby, please don't say these things...

-Vampi

Darren
08-31-2008, 12:23 PM
LOL I'm sorry, i was a bit odd last night o.0

Amy
08-31-2008, 05:08 PM
Alcohol ****s people up.. its a sad fact. :(

Vampi
08-31-2008, 07:48 PM
LOL I'm sorry, i was a bit odd last night o.0

Yeah...sure...


Alcohol ****s people up.. its a sad fact. :(

I'll take your word for it, that's really all I can say. I've never been drunk, never really been one to drink at all.


-Vampi

PestimisticAngel
08-31-2008, 09:03 PM
I'm happy that you stoped your friend and that she's alive safe and sound, but it's sorta messed up that she never thanked you but I guess she was too drunk, I dont know if it's good or bad that she doesnt remember it, I mean it's bad cause she cant thank you cause she doesnt rememeber it hapenning but it's good that she cant remember cause whoa she was really at the edge and in pain and thinking about such things makes us relive it reliving it brings back all of the emotions and feelings back and noone wants to be overwhelemed and in the same rut / hole that they were in before

SORRY if I'm rambling

Darren
08-31-2008, 11:42 PM
Yeah...sure...



I'll take your word for it, that's really all I can say. I've never been drunk, never really been one to drink at all.


-Vampi

Well....i can say don't get into it because the hangovers (i hardly get them, only now and then) are horrible and if you drink too much you puke and feel horrible afterwards.

Depending who you're drinking with affects you, some of my friends are depressing drunks and well...that affects you but othe friends are hyper drunks xDD That's well goooood.

And sometimes when you get drunk you can't get to sleep (like lastnight...) aaaaand if you're like me in which i generally get quite sleepy when i'm drunk LOL


Alcohol ****s people up.. its a sad fact. :(

Yea it does :[

Makes people do stupid things ¬___¬


I'm happy that you stoped your friend and that she's alive safe and sound, but it's sorta messed up that she never thanked you but I guess she was too drunk, I dont know if it's good or bad that she doesnt remember it, I mean it's bad cause she cant thank you cause she doesnt rememeber it hapenning but it's good that she cant remember cause whoa she was really at the edge and in pain and thinking about such things makes us relive it reliving it brings back all of the emotions and feelings back and noone wants to be overwhelemed and in the same rut / hole that they were in before

SORRY if I'm rambling Yea i wouldn't like to think what would of happened if i never went with her, it's best she doesn't remember i guess...therefore it probably won't happen anytime soon.

t_terrible
09-03-2008, 04:34 PM
yesss... i think i do sometimes. But im trying not to. I live because I think i still have bunch of stuff to do here. I don't want to waste my life- but sometimes the depression come to surface and it's all crazy.

Vampi
09-03-2008, 09:17 PM
I live because I think i still have bunch of stuff to do here. I don't want to waste my life...


Good way of thinking about it.

Alot of people rely on many of us, if not all of us.
EVERY decision you make changes your life...every.little.decision.


-Vampi

t_terrible
09-04-2008, 04:01 AM
Good way of thinking about it.

Alot of people rely on many of us, if not all of us.
EVERY decision you make changes your life...every.little.decision.


-Vampi


yes and i am fairly conscious about that.... MOST OF TIME (note: not ALL the time ;] ) but yknow, I believe I don't live just to die. haha

PestimisticAngel
04-12-2010, 03:02 AM
Sometimes I feel like a failure and like I cant do anything right, not out of the blue someone or something will trigger it. Then I feel not like living. I dont do anything about it though. I dont know what's after this and I dont know what would happen to me if I did that. Also I think may be one day I'll be doing something with my life, more than what I'm doing now, so If I aint here I cant see what I'll succeed in.

Robb
05-31-2010, 07:48 AM
I think about it quite often. Sometimes i even think about planning it out. But then I think of my family. I dont think they would miss me for me. They would miss me because they rely on me too much. It's me, my parents and my little sister. I'm the only one working. Im the one who does the cleaning and **** around the house, yet still trying to get ready for college.

The pressure surmounts sometimes, and i really think about it. I'll be driving down the road and think about running the car into a ditch, or off a bridge. But then i think of the others who would be affected. My parents would be one car short. They'd have to start waking up early again to take my little sister to school.

My boss would have to go through the stress of finding someone worthy enough to hire at my job. The only people that apply are crack-heads who have to use the back of the application to list their felonies. I'm one of the few people up there who actually know what they're doing, as well.

I always wonder about what stress it would cause others because so many people rely on me. But do they actually care?